We’re revisiting a form this week. The Dodoitsu is a fixed folk song form of Japanese origin and is often about love or humor. It has 26 syllables arranged as four lines of 7, 7, 7, 5 syllables respectively. It is unrhymed and non-metrical.
Find our previous example here: DODOITSU
SARA’S DODOITSU:
AMBER FIRE
Brought her trinkets of amber
pendant of fire that glowed
in darkness, shimmered in light
she left him ablaze
WALTER’S DODOITSU:
RANDOM HEARTS
two apart, yet together.
souls apart, yet joined as one.
hearts a part of a great love.
such are random hearts.
(C) Walter J. Wojtanik – 2016
POETIC BLOOMINGS 
Responses
I never know whether to put titles on these things or not…
My love is a red flower
that grows best in moist blue soil;
although she loves me too, she
dislikes my green thumb.
Agreed. It was like, you do not title a haiku but a haiku sonnet desires one, I think???? Maybe Walt will tell us if it is arbitrary.
It is written as a “song” and songs are titled, so I’d say Dodoitsu are titled as well!
Agreed.
Colorful and lovely description of her…
And she looks good in red, blue and green!
STILL THE BEST MEDICINE
Beyond drugs and surgery,
Let’s consider the value
Of observing the world with
a comedic eye
That sees humor in distress
And refuses to blink twice
at the ills that life might bring.
Learn to laugh them down.
When we were infants, we laughed
All the time. Why did we stop?
Were we told, Get serious!
Why did we obey?
Life’s road is filled with landmines
But you can’t float above them
Nor can you tiptoe in fear.
Take your chances and smile.
Some will decide you’re a fool,
A person of low IQ.
Just nod and they’ll go away.
Then laugh up your sleeve.
Drug companies and doctors
Will discourage your outbursts
Of laughter, for they know well
The power it brings.
Ignore them and outlive them!
Humor builds strong hearts; it will
add years to your life. Now
Take your medicine!
#
Right away, Doc!
Right on! I wonder what people would say if they found this poem tucked into their pill bottles. (I’m laughing as I imagine my husband’s reaction;)
Thank you, Dr. Sal !
I’ll take a double dose, please 🙂
Healthy living paradigm here…
Sage wisdom from our sage flashpoet(wise)guy!
Shauna was an acrobat
who caught her lover cheating,
so Shauna up and left him
with arms akimbo.
more laughter:)
(a carry over from the comment on Sal’s poem) LOVE the visual of this poem!!
Merry heart is good medicine. A smile of a poem, Salvatore
Love your sense of humor in this, William. (Sara)
big giggles here :-0
Thanks for the smile this prompts, William!
Great idea. Drop in anytime!
Thank-you Sara and Walt! Fun, fun form!
Rain-lover
Soft rain slips a cool blanket
Over the rounded shoulders
Of a summer-weary earth
Drained of its laughter
Janet, this is a breathtaking view!
This sounds like a rain following drought. Same here. I love this.
yesterday was our first more rain than sunny day of the summer! its been scorching here.
As her,e a few miles over the border. It rains heavily over night but stops and gets steamy by morning. Little relief. Love your poem, JR!
What lovely imagery in this, Janet. Glad you had some rain.
every line is so descriptive – this has a comforting feel
Love the metaphors and the musicality of this, Janet!
Circle of Life
They say love is a circle
That goes on and never ends
Only thing left of our love
Is my hula hoop
ooo! love the twist at the end!
Bingo!
And the humor continues! Love this, Iris. (Sara)
He, he, he
What Janet said: the twist at the end makes the geometry here particularly interesting…
Will it go ’round in circles? What a waist!
Love the name of this form and I like its length also. Sara and Walt, you bring such beauty and creativity alive. If we gave blooms, I would have to say you both deserve a blue ribbon!
Agreed!
Blooms are fully realized in the wonderful poetry you all contribute.
Thanks Ladies. We are merely the reflection of your brilliance! We bloom together!
Remembrance
What do you remember best?
Best? Beginnings and partings:
Yes, joys of every first time,
aches of each farewell.
Nurit Israeli
Wise and wonderful.
Thank you, William!
“aches of each farewell” is perfect ending.
Thanks, Iris!
So true, and well said, Nuit.
Thank you, Sara!
oh yes!
Outstanding Dodoitsu, Nurit! I love when you bring your worded wonder to the garden!
I truly love coming to this beautiful poetic garden, Walt!
You are most welcomed here, my friend. Everyone who visits becomes part of the “family” of poet gardeners!
Unbelievable
When she walked into my life
Instantly everything changed
Finally I was complete
Unbelievable
I can believe it. I have one of those too, Earl!
Work It
Falling in love is easy
Staying in love is hard work
It takes two to win love’s race
Let the race begin
right on! great wedding card poem!
Is is that.
these two are the perfect fit
Love the prescription…
I just keep kicking the can
Down the thoroughfare of life
Not paying much attention
To cars racing by
Wow. The visual is startling.
Yes, read it and re-read! wonderful.
Precise and incisive. Kudos.
Well penned, Connie.
sometimes that’s the best we can do 😉
Beautiful! Love this, Connie!
Love, a lovely convention;
a warm sort of detention;
but mainly, I should mention:
paying attention.
You said it!
Love your operational definition of love here, William!
I’d forgotten how much fun this form is…
.
Don’t Fit
It’s like a shirt with buttons
that won’t fit, that boy I loved,
said he and I didn’t fit.
Annoying buttons.
If they don’t fit, time to split. Or acquit, as the case may be.
clever girl, you
Love the twist at the end, Misky. Makes me smile…
BIG grin here.
I kissed her in the summer
and I kissed her in the fall,
Heck, I kissed her anytime.
Buts she? Not at all.
First Date
I thought I saw you smiling
at me across the table
candles flickering between
us so I smiled back
I can see it. Wonderful.